Fic from before 2005: http://recalibration.adamao.org
Fic from 2005 can be navigated to by my Dreamwidth tags (I had started to do this for earlier stories, but stopped when I realized a: anything before 2005 is at Recalibration; and b: I cannot remember when I stopped using this journal for workshopping thing), which are nested for your pleasure. Unlabelled content rated PG or below should be benign, labelled content or content rated PG-13 and up may contain dragons of the non-literal sort.
(So, a Supernatural story featuring Sam and Ruby would be fic:supernatural:het:sam/ruby.)
Yuletide Stories (possibly not crossposted):http://yuletidetreasure.org/archive/26/screenwritersblues.html
(Harold and Kumar)http://yuletidetreasure.org/archive/72/tigerbeaten.html
Stories I don't think I ever crossposted to my journal:http://community.livejournal.com/spn_summergen/6942.htmlhttp://community.livejournal.com/choc_fic/47101.html
Stories and snippets from this year's Porn BattleGladiator, Dark Angel, Alec/Normal, sides, fantasyHidden Depths, Batman, Alfred/Lucius, dedication
Stories written for Remixes:http://recalibration.adamao.org/insomnia.htmlhttp://recalibration.adamao.org/youjustdont.html
Well, expand, rework, and rewrite.
It involves... lists.
Many, many lists. Apparently.
One does hope said lists will at some point turn into prose.
Dreamwidth Friending Meme, 2015 edition!
I've found interesting people, with interests that overlap mine, even if I, umm, have utterly failed to talk about them outside my head.
Hello, new people. I'm very tired, because I spent all yesterday cleaning. This happens maybe thrice yearly, so, as you can imagine, it's a massive undertaking. Many a thing has been put in a box to go to Goodwill. Many a thing has found its way to the garbage or the recycle.
I'm of the belief that boxes, shipping boxes, breed when you leave them unattended.
Or I just do that much of my shopping online.
(The upstairs office and bedroom, where we work and sleep, is also where we put things where we tidy for guests. It's not ordinarily quite this bad, but last year, we wound up with all of the family photographs from one side, which were taking up what could be called an enormous amount of space, so between me having had the flu right before holiday entertaining, me starting a new job right after holiday entertaining, and the influx of new stuff, it became overwhelming.)
And this is hopefully not the sort of thrilling post you can expect to see from me, honestly.
Signed, if you had finished the Nat fic by now, that's another thing you could have read.
So, while MKK is basically a tame little fluffy kitten on me, it DOES occasionally manage to bring out something slightly more feral and growly if I mix it with things.
Which I did.
I mean, I wasn't meaning to do so, but I'd put on the MKK, and the Dzongkha was just sitting there, and I couldn't remember if I'd done it before (if I had, it wasn't when it was warm out), and basically, I think I now smell like youth and sex and really mellow bad choices with an incense burner going in the background.
Not in a bad way. To be clear.
More in an "I should maybe hop to a certain section in my Scrivener project now and do some additional work." kind of way.
Have accidentally fallen into Revenge, which I put on when I needed a break from Daredevil.
Have a long eventual explanation of how I wish Daredevil were more like Revenge, actually.
Have complicated feelings around Daredevil in general, which boil down to, "You could be so good, but you fall prey to and then indulgently wallow in some of the worst parts of the comics themselves, and I have read Kevin Smith's Guardian Devil arc."
I had the brilliant idea, while at the dog park, that I needed to take the timestamp file and break it into subfiles, one per chapter.
While I have legitimate reasons for this, AKA ones that make perfect sense and should allow for a much quicker final pass on things in the end, it doesn't help me actually finish writing the primary story. It's interesting, though, to see where things landed when I decided to break them out from one rambling sort of thing into separate pieces. They're an exercise rather than an end to their own, existing only because, as I've said, writing in tight 3rd limited from a single character's POV for tens of thousands of words in a story that spans six years means I occasionally stare at my Scrivener file and mutter, "Okay, but what's his motivation?" Now I have a visual of when and where I was most frustrated by the non-POV character's opacity.
I need to go back to changing exposition I wrote when I didn't feel like writing dialogue into dialogue, and also taking all the exposition from when the third chapter was the first chapter and putting it into the second chapter. (The whole reason I have two additional chapters is because the exposition was annoying me. It's not even that it's badly written exposition. Some of the wording will go in the discard pile for me to look at and potentially pull from in the future. It just doesn't work for me, structurally.)
Actually, this should probably be under [Fandom], but...
Hey, so how do you respond to a sweet comment on AO3 saying there should be a sequel to something you wrote, umm, 13 years ago or so?
"Dude, haven't even done a canon refresh on that one since I fell into Supernatural fandom in 2006, and that was, like, four fandoms ago." would be accurate, but probably not what I want to say.
Note: she no longer looks like the icon (probably a DW-only icon, anyhow).
I was recently going through my archives from 2004/2005 in search of something. I swear I feel like I'd been more talkative about the whole pregnancy and infancy piece, but apparently, that was only in my head, or at b.org. Mostly I talked about comics, Farscape, and occasionally touched on the bed rest and other assorted things of awfulness.
God, I told you guys before I told our families.
I should check my comments. I might have said crap in the comments. It's been a decade, after all.
Anyhow, yeah. The child is now 10. So that happened.
This, unsurprisingly, has made me feel old.
You'd get pictures, but I am lazy and don't feel like uploading. (These days, I only put pics up if she's doing cosplay, anyhow.)
Only took me almost four months...
(Time it would have taken me if not working: probably an additional four weeks from the day the job started.)
(Time it would have taken me if I remembered to turn off wifi whenever I felt like working on it: less than it has.)
Is 9200 words too many for one chapter? Do I need to break chapter six into two chapters? Is there a logical place for me *to* break it?
Later. I'll think about that later. Going to go back to writing the second chapter now.
Today is day three of a four-day convention. My first panel is at noon, my last one ends at 10.
TWO MORE DAYS OF FRONTING! BOO-YAH! I'm so cheerful and bouncy that it's utterly exhausting.
I made the executive decision that I'm not cosplaying on Sunday, by the by. I thought about it, but I can't top yesterday (my Peggy Carter cosplay, which is pretty epic, I guess, and got me a hall costume award), and today's cosplay is actually my most-beloved cosplay in the world (because NO ONE recognizes me as cosplaying unless they are a kindred spirit and remember what Natasha was wearing in the mall in Winter Soldier, and honestly, even if I dye the Splendid twofer jacket the screen accurate olive [I have it in the other color option], that'll still be the case) (also, it's comfortable).
I rewatched Push again yesterday, and realized I've hit the point where I can't be objective about anything in the damn movie. I was taking notes. I was pausing the movie to take notes.
CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLIDER CAME OUT A YEAR AGO TODAY. For the record.
So here I am, moderating a panel on the rise of the superhero movie in celebration or something.
And I still haven't finished my Natasha fic. It's still at 75%. Where it's been languishing since the Push story ate my brain. Honestly, I was going to finish it and post it today, but it turns out that a convention filled with people who have known you for more than half your life and one where you are on 10 panels is not a quiet spot to get some writing done. I've probably only managed 400 words this week on anything. Most irksome.
I met a Dumpster Buddy yesterday, though, so all is worthwhile.
Words that were basically "You could make them dress as Rollins and Rumlow! It sounds like I'm suggesting you cosplay the Hydra Trash Party!" slipped out of my mouth at the fanfic meet and greet last night, and, thankfully, the person has HTP involvement and was more amused than offended (I have poor impulse control and no filters at times), so I got to yammer in person about some of the things I've complained about in terms of finding a good space for that sort of story outside of the MCU.
Plus, tomorrow, I get to talk about fandom history and preservation. Hey! Anyone have anything they think should be covered? (I think we've got most of it probably covered, as we've been talking about it a few times a day, but a few from you guys is always welcome!)
Also, as well, too, nothing makes me happier than to hear people recommend things that my friends have written, and I got to hear that yesterday. It made me smile.
Okay. More coffee. Shoes on. Slip into that persona, and Bob's my uncle.
You know what would make my life easier, I say, as I go back and forth between the Push story rewrites and the "I am blowing off writing steam and am over-invested in this stupid drawerfic now" stuff?
My life would be easier if every fandom had its own version of the Hydra Trash Party.
It's not that the things I write for myself aren't things I would ever post so much as they are things I do not feel safe posting in the current climate around fandom, and even before that, felt weird posting because when I did, certain of the positive reactions made me exceedingly uncomfortable.
And... I'm not entirely certain how to articulate it beyond, "I want a safer-feeling space to post decidedly unsafe stories of the sort where the words safe, sane, and consensual have left the building and gone into witness protection."
But that space doesn't exist.
And means my poor friends wind up with late night text messages and emails as I talk about the concepts I'm wanting to explore in non-MCU fandoms, and I'm not finding new people to yammer at about said concepts, because there's nowhere that I know of to do it.
It doesn't help that the bulk of it's an alarmingly left brain exploration of the horrors of any sort of war and the ways in which people cope poorly with trauma. Which is another thing I'm not able to properly articulate, unfortunately.
Note to self: stop overthinking this.
Not, you know, over thinking themes. STOP OVERTHINKING WORD CHOICES.
Shockingly, I know, a very bad brain week is bad for writing.
As is a day job.
Subwarning: I don't really do earnest well.
Observations from this week in writing (AKA, "Oh, crap. I need to rewrite Europe" Week): if there's a change in how things flow between the first section and, say, the fourth or fifth section, your scope probably creeped. ( Read more...Collapse )
tl;dr: Scrivener is my BFF and I wish to marry it and live HEA with our little cyberbabies, and also, I just managed to write a hell of a lot without saying anything much at all about the actual story. I do want to talk about the actual story, just... not until I've finished it. Because I feel like I should probably finish it before I dwell on the relative success or failure of my efforts and/or talk about my decision making process with specific examples.
Every so often, something I wrote will have a sudden influx of kudos. With some of them, I know I am the only game in town with a rare pair, so those are understandable. Same goes with femslash above a G rating. Even that one I wrote when very drunk. Especially that one I wrote when very drunk, actually. (I reread it, and it wasn't as messy and random as I remembered it being, at least. It was Don't Trust the B* in Apartment 23, and I was method writing. Even though it was June POV, not Chloe. Err. Yeah. I should probably stop offering Black Books. I don't drink much anymore, and writing that would probably end with vomiting.)
But the Yuletide 2013 Broadchurch stories are a steady damn stream. One or both, for months (before S2), and I cannot figure out where the hell readers are finding them. We're talking most days in a week, I get mail about it.
However, I know I am such a mass of anxiety and self doubt that attempts to figure out the mystery would probably just lead to pain and suffering. So I haven't tried to find out. But it's driving me nuts.
I mean, fine, if you are one of the people with whom I text or iMessage, or if you are on a place where the streams don't cross, like FB, you hear me talk about other things, but other than that (and I've been quieter than usual on FB), I have hit this point where all I want to do is talk about writing.
Not even whine about it, because I think I can at least make that vaguely amusing. No, I want to have an Earnest Conversation About Technique. I want to stare into my navel until the navel becomes the abyss. I want to talk about my day in terms of, "Well, and then I realized the structure needed to be altered as such, so I went ahead and did some readjusting in Scrivener at 1am before going to sleep, and... oh, wait. You mean the parts of my day anyone who isn't me might actually care about, like work or what I ate for lunch, or why I came home with a CA:TWS poster at seeming random. Huh."
I think as close to amusing as it gets was this chat snippet this afternoon: "I had to break Canada into two parts. Quebec celebrated." (Okay, so that was on the heels of "I had to rewrite Europe." I think I could paste my notes to self and various texts into a document and call it Hetalia fic at this point. )
About 15,000 words ago, my notes to self were very professional and actually read like copyeditor comments. Now they've devolved into WHAT SHE SAW NEXT WILL STARTLE YOU! CLICK TO LEARN MORE! (actual comment I left myself in Scrivener)
It is possible I need to take a break and do something other than stare at the project.
It's just that I don't actually want to do that.
Which might indicate something of a problem.